Friday, May 23, 2014

My Cyber Peace Treaty

Our kids are plugged in, INSANELY plugged in. Matthew is a tech-geek and from the moment our children joined us he has strived to maximize and optimize technology in our lives. We each have a smart phone and tablet, there’s a computer lab in the basement, a projector/big screen/surround sound combo, an Xbox Kinect, Netflix, Hulu, and PSP’s. Did I mention the E-Readers? We are those parents. The ones you hate because your children want to come hang at our place when you won’t let them play video games. Sorry…For me to suggest we lessen technology in our home would cause a mutiny, led by my husband. I can’t have that. 

Headlines declare, “Children need less technology, more human interaction,” and popular parenting sites demonize technology as a Pied Piper leading us down the path of disconnection from one another. I am not a social psychologist, but I wonder if we are asking the right questions? Instead of analyzing how to limit technological exposure and increase social interaction in our children’s lives, what if we explored how we can leverage technology to increase social interaction in our children’s lives?

What if we used technology as a catalyst for authentic connectedness? Meaningful conversation and discussion about issues that matter could happen with rather than in spite of technology? It is this experimentation that I am focusing on in our home, because technology is here to stay. Short of some sort of zombie apocalypse (which I have not ruled out) technology is part of our lives, and my children will need to know how to navigate its waters safely.

Matthew and I both subscribe to news readers on our phones and most nights scroll through headlines covering everything from robots and science news to war and gender issues. We began texting the links to articles we thought our kids might find interesting. The other day I came across an article addressing body image, and sent it to Audrey. She has since had several conversations, not only with me but with her Dad too. We discussed how we are taught what is “beautiful” and “acceptable” as women and delighting in ourselves and embracing our beauty. Matthew mentioned the media’s objectification of women’s bodies, and how men have to question the messages they receive as well. This happened at the dinner table, and technology began it.

The possibilities are endless; it’s not just about sharing news articles. One night Audrey was struggling with some bad memories while trying to sleep. She shared that her mind was racing and asked me to come meditate with her. I have never really meditated with someone else before, so I was at a loss. However I climbed into her bed, and using my smart phone we listened to a guided calming meditation together.

Izzy and I have used a geo-caching app to look for nearby geo-caches together on walks. We raid dungeons together on World of Warcraft as a family. There are hundreds of links online, like these that make road trips more fun. Check this one out HERE!

I admit, technology can create disconnectedness, but rather than write off the cyber world as my children’s domain, I will join them there. 

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